Amphibians and Fabians

Frogs croak on littoral logs

And progs croak on blogs.

A bull bellows a romantic hit

While the prog has a virtual fit.

 

Progs praise Margaret and George B. Shaw.

Shaw, in celluloid, made the eternal faux pas.

Just like Margaret,

Shaw wanted to exterminate the weak.

Progressives should be ephemeral

And croak in a week.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Proctological Gymnastics

The DYNAMIC DUOdenum, Butt Man and Colon Polyp, like to play with their balls before putting them in their holes.

Barney the Hiney Sore taught them this exercise.



CAUTION:  Do not try this gymnastics move at home or your hiney will be sore too!

We Want a DUOver



THE DYNAMIC DUOdenum
WHERE SHIT BEGINS



The Postulates of the State

Postulate 1.  Nothing greater than the State exists. 

Postulate 2.  Since nothing greater than the State exists, the State is infallible.

Postulate 3.  The State has proven the truth of Darwinism.  The science cannot be questioned.  You, the individual, are the outcome of chaotic, random and mindless natural processes.  There is no God.  Ergo, there are no God-given rights.  You were not intended to be here.

Postulate 4.  The State has proven the truth of manmade climate change.  The science cannot be questioned.  You, the individual,  by just existing are a dangerous polluter.  It is in your nature.  You breath in priceless oxygen and breath out planet-burning carbon dioxide.  You digest the waving grains and create the greenhouse gas methane.  It would be better if you were not here.

Postulate 5.  The State accepts as fundamental truths that you were not intended to be here and it would be better if you were not here.  But, since you are here: You can make yourself useful by getting your ass to work serving the State.

The Great Blue Uprising

 

In the worst slanders ever done to native Americans, I give you:





Obama Say

 

Forget Confuscius, there's a new wiser man in town.

Obama say capitalist is doctor who cuts off feet so you not run to save tonsils.

Obama say money is root of all evil.  I will make you most righteous people on planet.

Obama say man cannot live by whole wheat bread alone.  Michelle will allow you carrot sticks too.

Obama say phrase "campaign stop" very inscrutible.

Obama say flipping bird at Bush worth more than 2 swing states in hand.

Obama say if at first you don't succeed, lie lie again.

Obama say there more than one way to skin cat, but I'd rather eat dog.

Obama say a Holder good place to carry an extra pair of super large cojones.

Obama say in Dreams From My Father white folk's greed runs a world in need.  (He really does)

Obama say Michelle, Valerie Jarrett and Elizabeth Warren tossed Churchill because his bust prettier than theirs.

Obama say he need 4 more years to find Oval Office and go to work.  He only find circular room so far.

A Bush in the Hand is One Not in the White House

ABSOLUTELY!

COME BACK SO I CAN THROW A SHOE AT YOU FOR CHOOSING JOHN ROBERTS.

The Redacted and Abridged CONstitution

The new and improved Constitution minus those pesky Bill of Rights.  Brought to you by your imperial presidency.





Dr. Strangehate



Or How Scientists Learned to Deny God

STEPHEN HAWKING & DR. STRANGELOVE

Shunning the obvious, many scientists refuse to accept the conclusion of an intelligent Creator of the universe and its lifeforms.  Instead, they propose preposterous explanations for both the existence of the universe and its lifeforms.

Preposterous explanation number 1.  Darwinism - Speciation through evolution was once a sensible theory but that time has long passed.  When Charles Darwin proposed his theory the cell was thought to be a simple container of "living substance".  Discoveries in Biochemistry and Cellular Biology have shown the cell to have factories, waste disposal systems, information storage and retrieval systems, and methods of propulsion that are far more advanced than anything Man has yet devised.  The bacterial flagellum is an inboard motor capable of self-repair and tens of thousands of rotations per minute.

In the approximately 150 years of the theory's existence there has not been one proven example of speciation occurring through evolutionary means.  As science the theory has no value, but it is Progressivism's favorite cudgel against religion.

Preposterous explanation number 2.  Multiverses - When scientists began to see that the physical laws, atomic and quantum particles, and the energies of the universe were extremely fine tuned to foster life, it wasn't a cause of celebration:  This pointed to an Intelligent Designer.  What to do?  When you have one universe so finely tuned, you explain it away by proposing an infinite number of universes, i.e. a multiverse.  With an infinite number of universes there will be some that look designed due to random chance.  This theory is unproveable because a scientist has an infinitely better chance of observing God than another universe.

Preposterous explanation number 3.  The universe began in a Big Bang comprised of nothing.  I mean nothing as in not a damn thing...no matter, no energy, zippo!  Stephen Hawking is a proponent of this theory.

Preposterous explanation number 4.  Manmade global warming - Along with Darwinism a favorite of progressives.  You're a heretic and a sinner against the Goddess, Mother Nature, if you do not believe.

Darwinism means you're just an outcome of chaotic, random, mindless processes.  A multiverse means you're even more insignificant than Darwin would have you.  And Stephen Hawking would have you believe that you are really nothing.

Have a nice day!

Bare Asses and Bad Asses

ADOLPH HITLER & NAZI PELOSI

RIDDLE:  What's the difference between a sewer rat and a Democrat politician?

ANSWER:  A sewer rat lives an honest life.

San Franciscans believe one of their inalienable rights is the liberty to bare their asses in public.  They're not too keen on the right to bear arms.  Their attitude on the Constitution in general is such that restaurants would probably have no qualms using the Constitution as paper coverlets for their chairs in preparation for their undressed clientele.   It's no wonder then why they elect Nazi Pelosi over and over again.

Just as Adolph Hitler used Jews as scapegoats, Nazi Pelosi uses Republicans.  Last week she said Republicans are voting to charge Eric Holder with contempt in a ruse to stop Holder from fighting voter suppression in Florida and other states.  Isn't it odd that Nazi never saw any voter suppression by the Black Panthers holding billy clubs outside a voting precinct in 2008?  With Democrats it's not voter suppression if it's your side doing the suppression or intimidation.  Actually, it's a good thing if an illegal vote negates the vote of an informed, analytical citizen.  You know, a Republican.

Speaking at a podium, Nazi's arms and hands wave about like drunken serpents in a spastic caricature of Adolph Hitler.  At any moment I expect her hair to turn into a mat of wriggling snake heads.  Instead of her gaze turning men into stone though, men's masculinity withdraws in recoiled terror.  The only thing imaginable that could cause more emasculating terror would be to see Michelle Obama in a black leather leotard, the chiseled muscles of her obsidian arms forcing out sweat with each crack of her whip.  With a sneer on her face as when she sees an American flag, she would be one bad ass momma!

Riddle Me This

Riddle:  What's the difference between Michelle Obama cursing the American flag at the tenth anniversary of 9/11 and gay activists at the White House flipping their finger at Ronald Reagan's portrait?

Answer:  You paid 5 trillion dollars to see Michelle's curse.

Michelle Obama called the American flag a "damn flag" at the tenth anniversary ceremony of 9/11 at Ground Zero.  She and Barack were the most pampered people at the event, with the "best seats in the house", and watched the flag-folding ceremony behind bullet proof glass.  Yet, she was obviously disgusted by the special treatment the American flag received. 


WATCH IT FOR YOURSELF:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OJgWMI0hch8&feature=related

Obama Boo-Boo Doll

OBAMA BOO-BOO DOLL

That old black magic will have you in its spell.  No, I'm not talking about voodoo.  I'm talking about the bewitching fun you'll have with your own Obama Boo-Boo Doll!  Print the doll image and paste it to a block of styrofoam.  Then cut out the pin labels, grab some pins and let the fun begin!

Make your own pin labels!  Watch the news for the latest gaffe you can "pin" on this administration.  You'll be having so much fun, you'll want it to never end!

PIN LABELS

$800 BILLION NON-STIMULUS

FORCED ABORTIFACIENTS

$5 TRILLION DEBT ADDED

SOLYNDRA

REDEFINE MARRIAGE

SHOVEL READY JOBS BOO-BOO

KEYSTONE XL PIPELINE

BOWING & KOWTOWING

ABANDONMENT OF IRANIAN PEOPLE

LIBYAN PEOPLE YES, SYRIAN PEOPLE NO

ISLAM YES, CHRISTIANITY NO