Smith and Wesson Stick

THE BEST WAY TO SHOOT YOURSELF-EE

If you're wondering:  Yes, he's stupid enough.  Except for the kitchen sink, the Iranians got everything they wanted in the nuke deal, yet when asked why the four Americans imprisoned in Iran weren't released, Obama said that would be external to the nuclear talks.  So, the Iranians getting conventional arms and permission to continue their ballistic missile program are part of nuclear research and development?  In a prog's world, maybe so.  But, even a dipshit prog can't fit the square peg in a round hole that is this nuke deal involving Qasem Soleimani.  Major General Qasem Soleimani is the commander of the Quds Force, and killed hundreds of American soldiers.  The nuke deal removes sanctions against this state-sponsored terrorist.

Forensics have proven that Iran killed 500 American soldiers during the Iraq and Afghan wars, mainly with sophisticated IEDs that could penetrate armored vehicles.  But, Iran also purchased European-made sniper rifles that were used in Iraq.  What did Bush and Obama do about it?  Not a goddamn thing.  Well, except for sanctions placed on Soleimani.

Every family of the 500 American soldiers proven to have been killed by Iran should receive 10 million dollars from the frozen assets that will soon be given to Iran.  That would be $5 billion that Iran could not use to commit more acts of terror.

Nuke Talks Gamesmanship Going Well

Pardon Me, That's Gamespersonship

Iran says, "Hike your leg and let one fly!"

Iran says,  "Look like the Great Satan."

Iran says, "Flirt with a world leader like a school boy."

Iran says, "Show the world what buffoons you are."

Iran says, "Break a leg."

Iran says, "Trip and break your neck coming down from Air Force One."

(NOW WE'RE GETTING TO THE GOOD PART.)

Pope Leaves Carbon Footprints All Over South America

Pope Francis, if that's his real name, says that the unfettered or unbridled pursuit of money is "the dung of the devil".  When pursuing anything, it is best to be unrestrained and to acquire whatever it is you're trying to acquire as efficiently as possible.

Suppose the Catholic Church in America lost its tax exempt status and was fettered with the same types of income taxes that businesses and corporations have to pay.  Would that not be a good thing for the Church?  After all, the Catholic Church presently is unfettered in its ability to pursue tithes and donations.  It is unrestrained in pursuing the dung of the devil.

While the pope may have meant that an individual pursuing wealth without the restraint of a "moral yolk" is evil, his words say otherwise.  There is nothing intrinsically immoral in the enthusiastic, vigorous pursuit of wealth.  Many people do so without harming another human being.  On the contrary, many do so at great benefit to others.

Before Jesus said, "Render to Caesar the things that are Caesar's, and to God the things that are God's", he asked his disciples whose image was on a coin.  His disciples replied, "Caesar's".  It would behoove the pope to let Caesar have his coins and put all his work into saving souls instead of trying to save Sister Earth from capitalists.  Damn commie.

The Return of Francis the Jackass

"The Church, as well as those of us outside of it, would do better to develop more humane, and less hysterical, responses to climate-related issues, and in ways that do not stomp on human aspiration. We should avoid the march full-speed backward in time, to the glorious elitism, mass poverty, and class stagnation of the Medieval era. The world’s people, and Francis’s flock, deserve better than that."

Excerpted from:  http://www.newgeography.com/content/004978-green-pope-goes-medieval-planet

Go Ahead and Replace Old Glory with the Rainbow Flag

Valerie Jarrett, with Obama's blessing, celebrated the SCOTUS decision on same-sex marriage by bathing the White House in the colors of the LBGT rainbow flag.

The colored exterior isn't half as loud and gaudy as the colored interior.

Loud: garish, conspicuous or ostentatious when referring to colors.  Obtrusively vulgar when referring to manners or persons.

Gaudy:  cheaply showy in a tasteless way

Bend Over and Kiss

Midgets Goodbye

It's verboten to use the word midget.   To not roil sensitivities, "little people" should be used.  In addition to not using "midget", you should also not use the word "midge".  They're little flies, you anti-dipteran.  Not using midge could save your life one day.

One day you're at an outdoor cocktail party rubbing elbows with the rich and famous, because Hillary Clinton and the Democratic party have made everyone rich and famous.  There are quite a few little people at the party, three of whom have taken the first, second and third places in a limbo contest.

You're on your fourth cocktail of sour mash and you're beginning to become a little careless as you sip from the edge of what was once a can for tomatoes or maybe green beans, and thinking how wonderful it is now that everyone could afford such luxuries.  One sip later, your cocktail starts resembling a Bloody Mary as blood from your cut lip starts mixing in the sour mash.

"Damn it.  I've cut my lip" is heard by a dozen or so party guests milling about.  Light-headedness and a bleeding lip agitate you to the point that the once minor nuisance of little flies flitting about take on the terror of the black ops helicopters that swarmed the Aunt Jemima syrup factory where you used to work last month.  The plant's managers were arrested and charged with a hate crime.  Sometimes you think political correctness has gone too far.

"These midges are little, annoying terrors!", you scream.  All of the party guests hear this, including the limbo winner, Moe Hill.  Moe wasn't in the best of moods either.  His fifth sour mash cocktail looked like a Bloody Mary.

Moe approaches you and yells, "Who the hell do you think you are, calling me a midge?"  (Moe knew that a midge could also mean a tiny person.)

You become enraged.  You pick Moe Hill up and throw his 60 pounds into a fountain.  Removing himself from the fountain, a soaking wet Moe Hill pulls a Derringer from his vest pocket, aims at your head, and fires.

The moral of this story is don't throw a Moe Hill into a fountain.  It would also be wise not to make mole hills into mountains, but America has already created such a mountain chain from mole hills for this to hardly matter any more.  Just one more Hill(ary) and you can kiss your ass goodbye.

Gone With the Wind

OR SOMETHING AS IMMATERIAL

Obama Administration: Dopes with Isotopes

Return of the Great Stink

Pope Francis may be right.  Maybe humans are turning the world into an "immense pile of filth".  Read an excerpt from an English parliament report calling for immediate legislative action to mitigate pollution in England's streams and rivers:

"That the increasing pollution of the rivers and streams of the country is an evil of national importance which urgently demands the application of remedial measures; that the discharge of sewage and the noxious refuse of factories into them is a source of nuisance and danger to health; that it acts injuriously not only on the locality where it occurs, but on the populations of the districts through which the polluted waters flow; that it poisons the water which in many cases forms the sole supply of the populations for all purposes, including drinking; and that it destroys the fish."

The above excerpt is from a report titled On the Pollution of the Rivers of the Kingdom; the Enormous Magnitude of the Evil...

(https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/On_the_Pollution_of_the_Rivers_of_the_Kingdom)

Judging by the report, Pope Francis should have written in his encyclical that humans are turning our sister, the earth, into an immense pile of filth lying in an ocean of immense filth.  He should have had the report not been written in 1868.

In the 19th century, the Thames river was the most polluted river in the world.  It was an open sewer that bred cholera and killed both fish and birds.  In 1858, a summer heat wave (obviously caused by manmade CO2 emissions from SUVs) helped create an event called the Great Stink.  The stench coming from the Thames river became so intense that the curtains of Parliament were dipped in chloride and lime in an attempt to filter out the odors.  (http://www.choleraandthethames.co.uk/cholera-in-london/the-great-stink/)

In the cartoon below, "Father Thames" is introducing his children, Cholera, Diphtheria, and Scrofula (tuberculosis of the neck) to "Lady London".

Fortunately today, the Thames river is much, much less polluted even though the population of London is now over 8 million.  In 1858, it was less than 3 million.

Today, we have another Great Stink.  The stench, this time, isn't coming from the Thames river but from progressives in government, science, education and even religious institutions.  The stench is composed of lies, dissembling, propaganda, leftist lawlessness,  bureaucratic regulations, executive orders, UN mandates and the like.

The Left, to include Pope Francis, think humankind can remake the Garden of Eden if we stop partaking of the "forbidden fruit".  For the Left, the forbidden fruit is fossil fuel - coal, oil, and natural gas.

For me, fossil fuels are the exact opposite of a forbidden fruit.  They are a gift from God, fully intended to be used for the betterment of Mankind.  It is surely a miracle that an abundant source of energy is right under our feet and whether humans use this energy source, it is still going to leach into the oceans and, for the Left, be an "immense cancer" in the tissues of our sister. 

I ask the Pope, "Shouldn't we remove this cancer from our sister?"

 

 

Daily Double on Word Play

Ever wonder what happened to Pope Benedict.  Well, Obama has Benedict for going on 7 years now.

Will Pope Benedict go down in history as Pope Benedict Arnold?  I believe most popes die on the job but for some reason Pope Benedict chose to retire which led to Pope Francis, which led to global warming alarm-ism getting fired up again.  Manmade global warming was on the ropes to such an extent that NOAA went back in history and changed temperature readings in order to remove the period of no warming that has occurred for around 18 years now.  How, you may ask, did NOAA do this?  NOAA recalculated past global temperatures by putting more emphasis on temperature readings taken on ocean water being taken in to cool ships' engines and putting less emphasis on ocean buoys and satellites specifically designed and calibrated to measure global temperatures.  That's like using Kim Kardashian's butt as a level because a champagne glass will sit on it instead of a tool designed for the job.

People, People Who Love Peepal

Are the most wonderful people in the world.

Ficus when I get angry.  Every murder has a bhodi.  I'm stretching word play to an extreme.

The Buddha is claimed to have attained enlightenment or supreme knowledge (bhodi) under a peepal tree  in 589 BC.  Perhaps, this is why the scientific name for the peepal tree is Ficus religiosa.  I know I'll never attain bhodi, but I would at least like to know what happened to the ficus tree that Obama planted in New Delhi in January.  A Google search on "Obama's ficus tree" doesn't produce a single follow-up article on whether the tree lost its leaves and died right after Obama planted it or just lost its leaves in preparation for new buds.  The only relevant article displayed in the Google search after February - stories on the ficus "death" - is my blog posting in March! Note the following excerpt from a CBS News article in February:

"It's a seasonal phenomenon," B.C Katiyar, a top regional government horticulturist, said Thursday, after he and other officials visited the tree and pronounced it in good health. "It will send out shoots within the next 10 days."

Why hasn't there been any updates on the tree?  Inquiring minds, and mine, want to know.  How about a little bhodi news media?

The conspiracy theorist that I am says that little ficus is deader than the wood in James Madison's casket.  After all, what hasn't Obama killed?  When the world's policeman and moral leader goes into hiding, the thugs take over from  Baltimore to the Ukraine.

The NYT can spend resources on Marco Rubio's 4 traffic violations in 20 years (2 were dropped), but they can't follow up on their Dear Leader's ficus?

You might find it silly that I care about a ficus tree in India when there are so many bigger stories like Caitlin Jenner, black white women, deflated footballs, Rubio's driving record, and Ben Carson's stance on gays, but I'm trying to make the case that Obama is the spawn of Satan.  If that SOB can kill a healthy tree in eight days, that ain't natural.  And wouldn't it be delicious for the spawn of Satan to kill a tree with "religiosa" in its name?

Tilting at Windmills

One definition of tilt is "to rush at or charge", as in a joust between two knights.  Tilting at windmills is an idiom derived from the novel Don Quixote.  Don Quixote was insane.  He thought himself  a chivalrous knight and at one point in the novel was going to battle 30 to 40 ferocious giants.  The giants were actually windmills.  Tilting at windmills means to attack imaginary enemies.  We live in a world where insane leaders, thinking themselves noble and chivalrous, fight an imaginary enemy with windmills.  One hundred years from now there could be the idiom Tilting at climate change which will mean imbeciles that destroyed a culture battling an imaginary carbon dragon.

We have a de facto Muslim and socialist/statist in the White House and a Gaia(ist) and socialist in the Vatican.  Barack Obama favors Islam over Christianity and big government over liberty.  Pope Francis is an anti-capitalist and favors governments controlling wealth and equitably distributing it.  The Pope also personifies the earth:

“ [She] is protesting for the wrong that we are doing to her, because of the irresponsible use and abuse of the goods that God has placed on her. We have grown up thinking that we were her owners and dominators, authorised to loot her. The violence that exists in the human heart, wounded by sin, is also manifest in the symptoms of illness that we see in the Earth, the water, the air and in living things.”

The above paragraph is an extract from the draft encyclical the Pope is to present shortly calling for the world to take manmade climate change seriously and to take immediate steps to control carbon dioxide emissions.  The words sound more like the writing of a planet worshiper, a follower of Gaia theory, than the words of a devout Catholic.  Is extracting the fossil fuels, that God made, from the earth "looting" the planet.  The Pope is essentially saying that Man is raping a feminine Earth, and not just any man but western, capitalist white men.  With all the crap that's blamed on white men, it's no wonder that Bruce Jenner wanted to become Caitlin.

The manifest symptoms of illness in the environment the Pope sees are not caused by capitalism.  Actually, some of the most polluted areas on the planet are in Russia, China, India, the Middle East, Africa, former Soviet bloc countries, and South America.  And the cleanest places on the planet are in free, modern industrialized countries that practice the least encumbered capitalism - America, Canada, Western Europe, Australia, Japan.  Pope Francis should discern that fact, but it's hard for him to see anything through that tiny slit of his helmet he's donned to go fight an imaginary dragon.